I love this, and wish I'd had the book when my kids were growing up. My favorite thing about what Culatta does is framing everything in terms of what TO do instead of what not to—back when our school district would call in some "expert" to do a program for parents, it was always an hysterical diatribe warning us about all the dangers of allowing your kid to interact online unless you were either watching over their shoulders or diligently snooping afterward to see what they'd been up to. (I went to one or two and then never again.) Also — yay Matilda! -And from an earlier post: I strongly encourage you to treat yourself to the audio of Ross Gay's Inciting Joy! Put it in your car, and you too will begin to look forward to running stupid errands.... I'm almost finished (after stretching it out over many wonderful weeks), which breaks my heart a little — except that I haven't read it yet, so I can do that next. Happy New Year, Courtney, and thanks for all you do.
I really liked the emphasis on KINDNESS that Culatta mentioned at the outset. What do you both think of Pamela Paul’s column “Kids’ Books Don’t Need to Be Only About Kids”? (NY Times, 12/3) There’s a thoughtful response to it in Letter to Editor in today’s NYT: “The best children’s books enchant, delight and charm children through the text, often in verse, and beautiful artwork. The dreary ones preach at them. We must be wary of the latter. Our job is to endear children to reading, not drive them from it.” (Margaret McGirr, p. A19). So my concern is about fostering kindness in kids without preaching, whether digital or not, because I fear that in ceaseless reading aloud to my kids and grandkids, I tended to preach too much, or selecting literature and programs in any form that failed in this respect. Suggestions? DD
Jan 6, 2023·edited Jan 6, 2023Liked by Courtney Martin
Courtney, I so appreciate you bringing the issue of class into this conversation. As a single mom with limited resources and loads of obligation I have had to lean on the "digital babysitter" more than is considered healthy, but what other options did I have? My kids do use screens a lot, but my oldest mostly now mostly uses his phone to read fan fiction and my youngest plays games with their friends. When they do watch tv on their devices or videos I can't help but feel like they're not watching more than I watched television growing up with two working parents. We watched tv from the moment we got home from school until we were sent to bed. And I'm only a little bit crazy. ;)
I also appreciated the distinction made between passive absorption of content and more active engagement with technology. When looked at that way I think my kids probably have better digital habits than I do. They like to interact with technology, and with the world as it is I feel like that's not a bad thing necessarily.
This is wonderful! Just put the book on hold at the library. So many good things here, and my kiddo is grown and almost out of the house, but what he is saying really feels so balanced-- and a relief to hear that the sort of self righteous criticism thrown at 'screen time' by those who do, is hitting people other than me as dishonest and unhelpful. I also find it interesting that Minecraft is a low bar activity, because Minecraft is a world of its own-- it can be amazingly high bar, you can learn a language and build an entire city-- ( not me hahaha but other more talented folks) as well as what might be the more common use, which can be simple and satisfying. And very helpful for me today, is the concept of teaching the skills within the context of where we use the skills. I am currently thinking of how training in two very different areas of my workplace looks-- and this concept is a lightbulb going on! yowza!
I love the paradigm of "high bar" and "low bar"! One of my favorite high-bar activities is responding to people's newsletters (either in the comments or directly emailing a writer back, especially if it's someone I know!). Low-bar that I could do without... definitely watching Instagram Reels. I've never met a Reel that's changed my life for the better. Begone!
Love the language given here to things I've thought about in a much less organized way but never attempted to articulate. Even with younger elementary kiddos, it feels accessible to discuss 'high bar' and 'lower bar' activities as well as more consciously articulating what I'm doing on my devices and why. Thank you!
My sons are young adults now, and I wish I’d had the term “screen value” when they were preteens & teens, and their friends’ parents were constantly bringing up the issue of “screen time” as if it were some unsolvable math problem. My husband is in the tech industry, and acquaintances would come to him with the question, thinking he’d have The Answer. I knew it wasn’t as simple as “two hours a day,” especially when I realized their screens were how they read books and socialized with friends and wrote blogs and created worlds to play in. Thanks for sharing Richard’s ideas with us, Courtney! Happy New Year!
I love this, and wish I'd had the book when my kids were growing up. My favorite thing about what Culatta does is framing everything in terms of what TO do instead of what not to—back when our school district would call in some "expert" to do a program for parents, it was always an hysterical diatribe warning us about all the dangers of allowing your kid to interact online unless you were either watching over their shoulders or diligently snooping afterward to see what they'd been up to. (I went to one or two and then never again.) Also — yay Matilda! -And from an earlier post: I strongly encourage you to treat yourself to the audio of Ross Gay's Inciting Joy! Put it in your car, and you too will begin to look forward to running stupid errands.... I'm almost finished (after stretching it out over many wonderful weeks), which breaks my heart a little — except that I haven't read it yet, so I can do that next. Happy New Year, Courtney, and thanks for all you do.
I really liked the emphasis on KINDNESS that Culatta mentioned at the outset. What do you both think of Pamela Paul’s column “Kids’ Books Don’t Need to Be Only About Kids”? (NY Times, 12/3) There’s a thoughtful response to it in Letter to Editor in today’s NYT: “The best children’s books enchant, delight and charm children through the text, often in verse, and beautiful artwork. The dreary ones preach at them. We must be wary of the latter. Our job is to endear children to reading, not drive them from it.” (Margaret McGirr, p. A19). So my concern is about fostering kindness in kids without preaching, whether digital or not, because I fear that in ceaseless reading aloud to my kids and grandkids, I tended to preach too much, or selecting literature and programs in any form that failed in this respect. Suggestions? DD
Courtney, I so appreciate you bringing the issue of class into this conversation. As a single mom with limited resources and loads of obligation I have had to lean on the "digital babysitter" more than is considered healthy, but what other options did I have? My kids do use screens a lot, but my oldest mostly now mostly uses his phone to read fan fiction and my youngest plays games with their friends. When they do watch tv on their devices or videos I can't help but feel like they're not watching more than I watched television growing up with two working parents. We watched tv from the moment we got home from school until we were sent to bed. And I'm only a little bit crazy. ;)
I also appreciated the distinction made between passive absorption of content and more active engagement with technology. When looked at that way I think my kids probably have better digital habits than I do. They like to interact with technology, and with the world as it is I feel like that's not a bad thing necessarily.
This is wonderful! Just put the book on hold at the library. So many good things here, and my kiddo is grown and almost out of the house, but what he is saying really feels so balanced-- and a relief to hear that the sort of self righteous criticism thrown at 'screen time' by those who do, is hitting people other than me as dishonest and unhelpful. I also find it interesting that Minecraft is a low bar activity, because Minecraft is a world of its own-- it can be amazingly high bar, you can learn a language and build an entire city-- ( not me hahaha but other more talented folks) as well as what might be the more common use, which can be simple and satisfying. And very helpful for me today, is the concept of teaching the skills within the context of where we use the skills. I am currently thinking of how training in two very different areas of my workplace looks-- and this concept is a lightbulb going on! yowza!
I love the paradigm of "high bar" and "low bar"! One of my favorite high-bar activities is responding to people's newsletters (either in the comments or directly emailing a writer back, especially if it's someone I know!). Low-bar that I could do without... definitely watching Instagram Reels. I've never met a Reel that's changed my life for the better. Begone!
Thanks immensely for your response to my question, Courtney, for these valuable suggestions, and for interviewing Culatta! DD
Love the language given here to things I've thought about in a much less organized way but never attempted to articulate. Even with younger elementary kiddos, it feels accessible to discuss 'high bar' and 'lower bar' activities as well as more consciously articulating what I'm doing on my devices and why. Thank you!
My sons are young adults now, and I wish I’d had the term “screen value” when they were preteens & teens, and their friends’ parents were constantly bringing up the issue of “screen time” as if it were some unsolvable math problem. My husband is in the tech industry, and acquaintances would come to him with the question, thinking he’d have The Answer. I knew it wasn’t as simple as “two hours a day,” especially when I realized their screens were how they read books and socialized with friends and wrote blogs and created worlds to play in. Thanks for sharing Richard’s ideas with us, Courtney! Happy New Year!
I love these ideas. Thanks for this close-up of the new book and of Richard himself.
This was incredible! Thanks so much, Melinda. I had an instinct towards this idea but no detail. I can't wait to read his book.