8 Comments

Loved this, Courtney. I loved Meghan's book and am so grateful it's in the world.

Expand full comment

I’m grateful for this reminder of living with & accompanying our bodies with chronic illness. As someone living with POTS, this feels like another iteration of the “care not control” theme. 💜

Expand full comment
Aug 12, 2022Liked by Courtney Martin

Thank you for this.

I’m reminded how our culture sends constant messages about getting over grief…and many other elements in our lives akin to illness. I love the idea of “living with” — that concept better explains what actually happens to all of us in our experiences — indeed we do live with everything that happens in our lives. In differing degrees and in different ways, but none of us ever can completely dismember from our self what we have lived. We can absorb, realign, adjust, accept, etc., but every experience stays with us in one way or another.

When I was 15 years old I had a knee surgery that left me immobile for 2 weeks in the hospital. That experience forever changed my view of my body and the infinite things that could and do happen to our physical selves that render us changed, differently abled, etc. I have been grateful for that early lesson as it informed me for all of the years that followed (I’m 68), how wondrous it is when our bodies work. Two rooms down from hospital room, a man was recovering from multiple surgeries after he fell from a ladder and caught his foot in between the ladder steps, literally tearing his foot nearly off. I remember listening to him scream and moan in pain, and my being told about what had happened to him. Another person on the same floor was recovering from being hit by lightening. I learned that person was likely not leaving the hospital.

After I was discharged, I took with me the feelings of how wondrous it is when we are not in pain. How wondrous it is to see, to move, to smell, to feel. All the things that so often we take for granted. All those same things can be gone in an instant, or changed to such a degree as to render us unable to do what we expect we can do. Living with our pain, our illness, our suffering is a much better way of letting go of the need to “get over” a thing, or “let go” of whatever it is. This makes me laugh but:

Letting go of letting go.

I live with that long-ago experience and many others that keep me alert to being grateful, to having empathy for myself and for all fellow humans for the pain and suffering we all will or have faced --. I'm reminded of the writing This is Water. We are where and what we are, whatever is, is. We don't have to muscle through or get over, living with allows us to stop resisting, stop avoiding, to relax and allow us to just be.

Will be ordering the book, looking forward to an honest & real read.

Expand full comment
Aug 12, 2022Liked by Courtney Martin

I’m so full of appreciation you are shining a light on Meghan’s work and this book. I can remember exactly where I was, listening to her talk about this book and her illness, tears of recognition streaming down my face as she gave words to my own journey. Huge thanks!!

Expand full comment